AGE GAP RELATIONSHIPS

8 Ways to Bridge the Age Gap in Your Relationship

Are you entering a new relationship? With a large age gap difference? As people say, ‘it’s just a number’, but being in an age gap relationship does come with a few difficulties compared to other couples. However, if it’s true love, nothing will get in your way. Some studies relationship satisfaction reported by age-gap couples is higher! 

Does Age difference in relationships matter?

Romantic couples with a large age gap often raise eyebrows. Studies have found partners with more than a ten-year gap in age experience social disapproval. But when it comes to our own relationships, both men and women prefer someone their own age but are open to an age gap of 10-15 years.

There is a variation across cultures in the size of the difference in age-gap couples. all cultures demonstrate the age-gap couple phenomenon. In some non-Western countries, the average age gap is much larger than in Western countries. 

Things to consider in an age difference relationship.

When you’re in an age gap relationship, your insecurities, and even flaws, can bring a whole host of issues to the table. Things that you wouldn’t usually think twice about, may start taking over your thoughts. Did you act too immature? Or are you going too fast?

The most important opinions on your relationship are your own. Both of you must be careful not to let outsiders influence how you may feel about or treat each other. However, for your relationship to work, it does mean that you both need to find a happy medium with your friends and family. 

A factor that does impact the outcomes of age-gap couples is their perceptions of social disapproval. If one partner believes their family, friends and wider community disapprove of their union, then relationship commitment decreases and the risk of break-up increases. Unfortunately. 

Your social lives may not merge as easily as you think but give it time and don’t expect that either one of you should give up your friends and family for the relationship to work. This will eventually make one or both of you feel resentful.

It’s hard. We like to believe that we don’t care what others think but it’s usually not true. 

You need to be united though for the relationship to thrive!

If you’re older, don’t assume you know best or patronise your partner, and if you’re younger, don’t forget that you have a voice, they don’t know best, but don’t turn to childish characteristics. It is key that the relationship strikes a balance and that you don’t slip into a parent/child relationship. 

The power dynamic.

With age-gap relationships, a common mistake is to assume the age difference is the only power dynamic at play or that it’s the most important one and associated with either a desire to control or a need for security. 

Even if relationships are ostensibly equal, there’s always a power dynamic to consider. They may be almost imperceptible, but imbalances exist, whether it’s the ability to stay rational amid chaos or big ones such as class, wealth, life experiences, education, or emotional maturity. 

Relationships work best when they are mutually beneficial… 

Don’t force your relationship on them.

Let them see how well your relationship is working and involve them in your life. Only those who don’t truly care for your happiness will struggle to support you and your relationship. Be careful of being paranoid and making assumptions about your friends and family’s opinions that aren’t real!

Age Preferences Are Embedded Into Our Mating Psychology.

Evolutionary psychology is based on the premise that the human mind has evolved adaptive strategies to support reproduction and survival (Buss, 2016). 

Ancestrally, women benefited by seeking men who have the status and resources to support their child-rearing and the willingness to do so. These traits are tied to older men. 

Men, meanwhile, have evolved a preference for younger women because their youth is a signal for fertility, and over eons and eons, men have better reproductive success when they partner with women who can bear children. Therefore, larger age gap relationships tend to be this way round.

But, age is just a number, right? If you’re happy, go for it!

SHOULD YOU RELOCATE FOR A RELATIONSHIP?

18 Signs You're Ready to Move In Together | Glamour

Should you move to a new town, county or even a new country, for the sake of a relationship? Keep reading to find out whether you should relocate for a relationship!

While long distance relationships are possible, most people would prefer to live close to one another. Or together!

However, relocating somewhere new is a big decision and you need to consider what you’re moving for and what you’ll be giving up. Below are Unified Dating’s suggestions to help you further decide whether relocating is a good idea! 

How far will you be moving?

There’s a massive difference between moving to a new town a few miles away and moving half-way across the world!

 Moving further away means moving further away from home – which could make keeping contact with friends and relatives harder. There will also be greater cultural changes the further you move away. 

Generally, you shouldn’t move too far away unless you really know a person, which leads to the next point…

How well do you know each other?

You should never relocate far away to be someone you barely know. If you’ve only talked online, go take the step to meet in person first. Ideally for over a month so that you can really get to know them. Wait to get to know your partner better before deciding whether you should relocate for a relationship!

If you’re already in a long and steady relationship and you’re currently living together, relocating together is not so much of a leap. And won’t feel as scary either.

If you know your partner inside-out and feel that this is causing things to get stale, moving away together could in fact be just what is needed to spice things up! It could even be a way of learning more about each other so that you can keep building on your relationship. 

Are there any deal breakers in the relationship?

If you’re making any huge life decision together, you should be at the point in your relationship that there are no deal breakers.

This means that no amount of dirty towels on the floor, messy dishes in the sink, or future fights would be enough to break you up. You’ve seen each other at your worst, yet you still feel fully committed to each other! 

This is why we would recommend living with your partner for a while before relocating with them.

Is it a temporary or permanent move?

You should consider whether it’s likely to be a temporary move or a permanent move. 

If your partner wants to move away for a few months for a work project or to look after a sick relative, you may have the option to stay at home and maintain a long-distance relationship. Alternatively, it could be exciting to move away for a few months without the worry of a permanent move (of course only if you work from home or your boss is okay with it!). 

Are you both in a good financial situation?

This is one of the most important aspects of the topic. Unfortunately money is always a main issue so whether you should relocate for a relationship or not, really does depend if you can afford it.

Strategize your own financial situation, and since moving is expensive, figure out if you can comfortably afford it on your own. You should then have a discussion with your partner about their finances. What if you don’t find a job for six months or even a year, can they cover the whole rent? And what about groceries and so on… 

Would you enjoy living in the city you’re moving to?

Can you see your new town or city as your home?

You should think of all the factors that go into the new place you’ll be living. It’s likely you will be far away from your family and friends. 

Yes, a relationship requires sacrifice at times, but if you are never going to feel completely happy and at home in your new place, then you and your partner should make a compromise to find a city you both can live in.

If things don’t work out, what’s your backup plan?

And finally… the question that you don’t want to think about. What happens if you break up? 

Even if there are no more deal breakers and your relationship is serious, the logical thinker knows there is always the chance it might not work out.

You should always have a backup plan, or at least think about what you would do if you and your partner broke up.

Would you keep the job you get and continue pursuing your career in the city you moved to, or would you quit and move back home? Make sure you have a plan you feel comfortable with before you make the move.

And it’s perfectly okay to change your mind/ back up plan at a later date!

Whether you should relocate for a relationship or not, if completely up to you and whether you feel comfortable doing so. Just make sure to think through our suggestions before taking a massive leap!

HARNESSING NEW HABITS FOR POSITIVE CHANGE

Kalpvriksh Guru on Twitter: "Let us leave our unending desires for  materialistic gains and selfish prayers and focus towards progress in life  by helping others with love and care. #MondayMotivaton…  https://t.co/KHbdRp3vWv"

Habit. We all know the word, but what does it really mean and why are habits important? Habits are one of the fundamental components of living your best life. Good habits can foster a positive mindset and can be the key to understanding how to change something in your life, both physically and mentally. Harnessing new habits fro positive change is completely possible! Continue reading this article for top tips for harnessing new habits. 

Every day, habit drives us to do what we do. Whether it’s a pattern of thoughts or behaviour. But how can you harness the power of your habits for the better? 

When you have a foundation of good habits, you’re setting yourself up for a full, healthy, and successful life.

Here are Unified Dating’s steps to changing your habits that really can change your life.

Identify your Key Habit and focus on it.

The key habit is different for everyone, and it may take a few sessions of deep thinking to pinpoint exactly what that habit is. Whichever habit you’re working on, pick one at a time. More than one at a time will be overwhelming and will increase your likelihood of failing to improve any habits. Identify your current routine and the reward you get from it.

Take time to identify you’re your routine – the good parts, and bad. It’s important to understand what you are currently doing wrong. But it’s equally important to reward yourself for the good habits you have adopted in your daily routine.

Consider the challenges.

Challenges are often cues that push you to fall back into old habits. These challenges will not magically disappear, so you need to take them into account. Before you start your new habit so that you are 100% prepared beforehand

Don’t let the presence of challenges or worry that new challenges will come up in the future. This may stop you from establishing your new habits.

Plan your new routine and pinpoint the reward.

Old habits never disappear; they are simply replaced with new habits. In the example of getting to the office earlier, the new routine involves leaving the house a half hour earlier. 

Set up a 30-day challenge.

Many studies show that habits, when performed daily, can become part of your routine in as  little as 21 days. So set a start date and launch your plan of action for a trial 30-day period. You can plan your reward for each 30 days until it becomes second nature.

Power through any setbacks.

Sometimes life can just get in the way of new goals. If something sways you from your challenge, the best course of action is to evaluate the situation and see how you can get around, over, or through that obstacle. 

Hold yourself publicly accountable.

Your support network is the most valuable tool you will ever have access to.

Make sure the people around you are aware of your challenge. As well as a great support system, it will make you more likely to achieve your habit. 

Why not ask a friend to act as your personal mentor?! They can check you are executing the habit, especially during the critical first 30 days!

Harnessing new habits for positive change will help you become a better person and can even help your relationships!

Summer Date Ideas in London

London's top rooftop spaces for summer events

It doesn’t matter if you’re meeting someone for the first time or have been married for years, we should all go on more dates, right?! Dating allows you to spend precious time with your other half and get to know someone And while a cosy night on the sofa is perfectly fine some evenings, sometimes we have to get out and try new things. Keep reading for Unified Dating’s top summer date ideas in London!

We all want to show our dates our best side: spontaneous, fun to be with and creative! So why not be the one to come up with a great date idea?

In crazy and hectic city like London, picking the right activity for your date can be daunting. Which is why we have complied out favourite things to do on a date in London. Some are unusual and quirky, and others just romantic classics. Impress your date with your dance moves at the roller disco or escape to fantastic worlds with a VR experience, it’s time to sort the next date night. 

Coronavirus and the lockdown might have kept us inside for longer than some have hoped, but the urge to do things has only gotten stronger. And now with the restrictions all lifted (hopefully permanently!), plus the amazing weather, we all need to make the most out of it and get back in the swing of date nights!

Kayak to CRATE Brewery.

Paddle through London’s oldest canal from Limehouse to Crate Brewery’s bar on the water’s edge in Hackney Wick. A true urban adventure.

Although remember to bring some waterproof clothes for this adventure in case you get splashed along the way!

Go on a Picnic.

Stock a Picnic Basket at one of London’s food markets and then go on a picnic! This is a great opportunity to learn about each other’s food preferences and tastes. And it also offers many of conversation starters when you are strolling around your chosen food market!

Chat over a world-class coffee.

If there’s one thing London knows how to do, it’s a delicious cup of coffee. And having a chilled chat over a latte is a great relaxed option for a first date. Pus, it doesn’t have to be too long. Some of our favourites include Monmouth Coffee Company  and Ozone Coffee.

Soak In Atmospheric, Candlelit Baths.

If you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to bathe the outside of your body in red wine, then we’ve got good news for you.

Because AIRE Ancient Baths has come to London.

Next-Level Gaming Bar.

Platform in Shoreditch is London’s first dedicated video game and e-sports bar and restaurant. It is the perfect spot for a quirky date! Even if you are not a gamer! Promising fun activities, great pizza and a bar loaded with drinks, it’s a sure winner.

Try your hands at a Pottery Class

Now for something completely different. There’s something of a pottery craze sweeping the capital this summer. Perhaps as a push to be more sustainable means we want more handmade, unique, less mass-produced items in our homes. 

But be ready to get a little messy!

Retro Arcading.

Mix up your date night with Queens. Not only can you have a romantic meal of MEATliquor food and coctials, but you can also challenge your date to a game of bowling or an arcade game!

Head to a rooftop venue for the great views.

Nothing says ‘romantic date’ like a rooftop bar or restaurant with sprawling views over the city. Take your pick from the hundreds, probably thousands of rooftop bars in London.

Have some laughs at comedy night.

Laughter is key for a good first date, so why not book in to one of the capital’s excellent comedy nights? 

For example, Comedy Fridays at Boulevard Theatre alternate between female-led improv ‘The Yes Queens’ and ‘unruly mixed bill comedy’ in the Late Night Scene.

Have an unusual film experience at Backyard Cinema.

Backyard Cinema specialises in experiential film screenings in quirky settings. We’re talking about sitting down to watch Romeo and Juliet (1996) in Highbury’s Union Chapel, decorated with neon crucifixes, enjoying its soundtrack backed by a live choir. Perfect, right?!

There are plenty of Summer Date Ideas in London to choose from! Comment below if you have any other recommendations!